Jim Cummings

The only jobs I've had at Disney parks were in attractions. The attraction I worked on at Disney World was a live show called "Festival of the Lion King". The job varied by the hour, as my co-workers and I alternated theater positions, generally as ushers, but some of what we did included guarding the entrance, guarding the exit, supervising the rest of the ushers, or moving strollers (which usually didn't contain abandoned children).

One day, I stood at the exit. That place was always quiet and empty, so I prepared myself for an hour of monotony. Then I looked at the VIP list for our upcoming show and noticed a familiar name: Cummings.

VIPs are told to enter the arena theater space through the exit. They usually show up half an hour to a minute before the play starts, and we seat them in the very front row so they can publicly interact with the performers at the very start of the a show.

The name stared back at me... "Cummings". I know that name. But what are the chances that this is the "Cummings" I know? After all, anyone could be a VIP. They don't have to be rich or famous. Any area leader can radio us to put a new name and party number on the list, for whatever reason. Often it's because a guest complained about something else that day, or if they simply called in advance to get really good seats. What are the chances that Jim Cummings, one of my favorite voice actors and all-time idols, is coming to this show?

Jim Cummings has probably the most prolific voice entertainment history, a voice acting legend who has been in hundreds of movies, video games, and t.v. shows. Just to give you an idea, he's voiced Goofy's neighbor "Pete", Winnie the Pooh, Tigger, and Eeyore. He's been in "Pocahontas", "The Hunchback of Notre Dame", "The Little Mermaid", he even voiced Razoul from "Aladdin" (the town guard who tried to chop Jasmine's arm off).

"We just keep running into each other, don't we, street rat?"

I radioed to my fellow cast members that they need to leave the front row of "Elephant" section open for a party of 4 or 5 (I can't remember which) because that was my job, but more importantly, if it was Jim Cummings, we couldn't screw this up. When Jeremy Irons didn't do the voice for Scar in "The Lion King", Cummings took his place. "The Lion King" probably means a lot to the guy.

My manager for that day replied on his headset, telling me to keep the "chatter" to a minimum as they were loading the theater.

"Just make sure to leave the front of 'Elephant' open," I replied.

Eventually, I began to doubt that anyone would show up. The show would start in less than a minute, and just then, I saw Jim Cummings and his family walking towards me, accompanied with a guest relations tour guide.

"You guys still left the 'elephant' front row open, right?" I asked my crew on the radio.

"Nope. Filled it up," someone replied.

F%&#.

It's considered a "Disney courtesy" to never ask someone to move once you've seated them somewhere. I'm sure it's a courtesy in every service oriented line of work, but doing that at Disney Parks is close to sin.

"Well, Jim Cummings is here with his family and they're gonna need a seat."

"Who?" I hear on the headset.

Maybe I was more disappointed than I should have been. I recognize that not everyone who works for Disney Parks is a fan of the brand, but if you're going to work at "THE Lion King" show, you really should know the basics.

A few seconds later, I was standing face-to-face with the guy responsible for tons of my childhood memories.

The talented Jim Cummings.

He stopped for a second, looked around and asked "You guys have any water in there?"

His voice was smooth, unlike the raspy voiced characters he often plays.

"Well, not inside the theater," I started to reply. I wished I could have had even a few seconds to say anything else of value, but one of my co-workers beckoned him and his party inside. The guest relations cast member told him to go on in while she gets him a bottle. I watched as my co-workers awkwardly asked the guests they'd originally seated to move for a "higher profile guest".

After the show, one of my fellow cast members approached me and asked "Phil! Did you know Jim Cummings came to our last show?"

I was just glad to know someone I worked with appreciated the talent behind so many beloved Disney movies.

Thanks for reading,

-Philip

Oxford

I follow an online news site called "Business Insider". They recently posted an article highlighting 13 abstract interview questions that Oxford University asks its candidates before granting admission into the prestigious university. There are apparently no right or wrong answers-- they're more subjective so as to discover what kind of person you are.

Here are the questions, as well as my answers:

Question 1: Is it easier for organisms to live in the sea or on land?

That depends on whether or not you would prefer to float in the endless ocean, constantly being bathed by the salty seas, scavenging for krill while luckily avoiding bait, or if you'd like to graze in the forest, your ears twitching every so often at the sound of each distant, snapping twig, in fear that it might be an irrational mammal bearing an overpowered machine.

I wouldn't mind trading places with a jellyfish for a day. Then again, I doubt jellyfish have much of an emotional connection to anything in their lives seeing as how they are mostly giant bacteria.

Question 2: What makes a short story different from a novel?

Most people would probably say "the length". In fact, most people would probably say "Most people would probably say 'the length'".

Good authors can write both. The difference is the amount of time invested. Not by the author, but by the reader. I consider movies based on books to be the "short story" versions of the books they're based on. This is because a book not only might take longer to read than the average film, but more pages are devoted to the description of the protagonist's environment and thought processes, creating a more lasting impression on the reader.

Novels can also be best sellers because they provide long lasting value.

Question 3: Imagine we had no records about the past at all, except everything to do with sport-- how much of the past could we find out about?

The story goes that Olympians used to compete in the nude, so you can learn a lot about what is socially acceptable in each period.

Question 4: Why do human beings have two eyes?

Conveniently, having two eyes lets us see in 3D. As for why we ended up having two eyes, that was either the maker's will, or a perfect evolutionary accident.

Question 5: Should poetry be difficult to understand?

No, it should not be,

It really should never be,

Why is it ever?

Question 6: Is violence always political? Does "political" mean something different in different contexts?

In war, yes, violence is political. In civilian life, people commit violent crimes, some premeditated and others out of passion.

Animals are also violent. The "politics" involved in the animal kingdom pertain to a literal food chain. Humans, in our modern society, vie to be figuratively on top.

But "political" has several meanings. While a politician might use the word "political" to describe foreign affairs, a student might scold another classmate for saying something "politically incorrect".

Question 7: Ladybirds are red. So are strawberries. Why?

They could have just as easily been blue.

Question 8: If the punishment for parking on double yellow lines were death, and therefore nobody did it, would that be a just and effective law?

If no one really did park on double yellow lines in fear of this punishment, it would be an effective law, but criminally unjust.

I'm a firm believer that a vast majority of crimes go unreported, often unnoticed. So I know there would be people who would break that law and not get caught. Therefore, it would realistically be an ineffective law, and if another person was caught and punished, grossly unjust for the "guilty" person(s).

Question 9: Why do you think an English student might be interested in the fact that Coronation Street has been running for 50 years?

I have never seen this show, but from what I know, it's an English soap opera. Although I believe any scholar should be interested in the fact that any show would last that long. It says a lot about the viewers and might not necessarily mean the show is good or bad, but that it has done a successful job of creating a transgenerational cult following, like "Doctor Who".

Question 10: What is "normal" for humans?

A lot of people strive for "normalcy" in their lives. They try to blend in with their environments, colleagues, and culture in an attempt to avoid conflict and maximize opportunity.

Then there are those who do the exact opposite in an attempt to spite others, or to combat the monotony of an average life, or because they're on a quest to discover new things about themselves that differentiate them from everyone else.

Normalcy is relative. Like I mentioned earlier, Olympians used to compete nude. Maybe that will happen again, but nudity is currently not "normal" enough to broadcast on network television.

Question 11: Would it matter if tigers became extinct?

It would matter to the tigers.

It would more than likely matter to their ecosystems, too. There's a popular video online about how the emergence of wolves helped Yellowstone National Park become a more thriving wildlife community, inviting more animals, catalyzing plant growth, ultimately even displaying a positive effect on the rivers.

Question 12: If you could invent a new musical instrument, what kind of sound would it make?

I'm a fan of all music. I really enjoy Indian "Raga", especially the relaxing sound a good tabla drum. I also love the resonance of the gong, so my instrument would be a new blend of the "gong" and "tabla".

Question 13: Here's a cactus (there's a picture of a cactus). Tell me about it.

Cacti aren't very sociable.

And those are the 13 Oxford questions.

Here's the wolf video I referred to in question 11.

And here's the Business Insider article that inspired today's blog.

Thanks for reading,

-Philip

The Disney Proposition

Last week, Disneyland offered me the chance to be a lifeguard.

I turned them down.

Let me start over. Walt Disney Parks and Resorts responded to my job application, in which I applied to work either at an attraction or as a lifeguard. The e-mail read: "Congratulations! We want you to be a lifeguard and stuff!"

(I'm paraphrasing, don't quote me on that)

The catch is that it would be employment through another Disney college program. It's a temp job-- eight months this time. I've already done a four month program in Anaheim and another in Florida.

I've also had some of my best and worst days in both programs, respectively. It's like a drug, with its extreme ups and downs: Good friends, beautiful women, poverty, unforgettable atmospheres in firework-lit evenings, $7 an hour, drinks, days off spent in bizarre worlds brought to life with furry Disney characters that are clearly sweating on the inside, extremely crowded environments, solitude, and apartments that are clearly not up to code.

You meet people of all ages, mostly college aged, and the majority of them are nothing short of wonderful. And when it comes to park guests, you meet adventurous people, kind people, blissfully ignorant people from every corner of the globe who are antsy to see everything from the best angle in the shortest amount of time before heading back to their mundane grind. It's like a full-time job that doubles as an extended vacation from reality. I was out of the loop when it came to world news in both four month programs.

When you're there, you don't feel like yourself. At least, I didn't. I felt like I was living a different life, through someone else's eyes. I was obviously still me, but knowing that it was temporary made every day feel somewhat sacred. Even standing outside, waiting for the rain to subside so we can open up Storybook Land again was surprisingly beautiful, and I don't know why. It's just one of those things where your life always has a different tone, and the tone when I started working in Disneyland was just nice. It felt "colorful", if that helps.

But that spark is gone for me. The other times I applied, I was so excited to see new things, I put a lot of the logistics aside. Now that I know what to expect... let's just say I'm tired of moving strollers.

I was also a different person then. More nervous, less ambitious. Marc Maron once said something along the lines of "If you go somewhere, you're still taking you with you" (again, don't quote me on that). But I totally agree. When I went to Anaheim and Florida, I freaked out about everything. I thought I lost my phone on the first day in Anaheim, I freaked out about getting placed in the best apartment in Florida. Most importantly, I felt way too powerless both times since your program can be finished abruptly at any given time if one of your affiliates does something foolish. I once heard of an entire room that was fired because one of their parents cooked with wine in their non-alcoholic apartment.

While I contemplated clicking the "I accept" button yesterday, a surge of dread ran through me. "What are you expecting?" I thought. "You really think this will get you closer to where you're going to go?"

"Well", said the rational part of my brain, "I wouldn't mind working at the Disney studios. Maybe this will be my foot in the door."

And it's possible. But based on my experience and personal testimonials, very unlikely. Optimistic as I am, I'm also a realist.

I was good at what I did there. I took a lot of pride in it. I met people that-- if I was in a better state of mind-- would have given more time and affection to. But deep down, I knew I would say no to the offer this time around. I knew that because what fascinated me most was the idea of it all. And that's too vague.

You know what's not vague? Two vultures wearing bear costumes to a Halloween party so they can steal pumpkin pie from the mini fridge. That's specific.